Gambians who grew up in Norway will definitely feel me on this. I'm not talking about the ones who came here as adolescents or young adults, I'm talking about the ones that were born and bred here and/or the ones who came here as kids. The reason I make this distinction is because there's a great divide between us and "them". The newcomers. I don't know why this is - well actually I do know. Those of us who are raised here are considered "toubabs". Up until my early twenties I was obsessed with trying to fit in, to conform to whatever is considered Gambian enough. Every time I heard a story of a bi-racial person (in this case a person of Gambian and Norwegian heritage) telling a sad story about how they never fit in, I soooo could relate. I felt the exact same way.
Growing up, my parents were super strict. I mean, SUPER STRICT. BossMama didn't play, lemme tell you. I wasn't allowed to do shit! "Good girls" are supposed to be at home and taught how to be good wives and mothers, and not become "idle" or "perdy" which basically means a fast girl. Can you imagine how that's like as a teenager? I had to sneak out to go to house parties and other festivities. Like Chris Rock said, I lied so much to my parents that it damned near became a language. I got so used to lying about sh!t that I even lied even sh!t I didn't have to lie about. Damn shame. I grew up with Norwegian kids and it was hard explaining to them why my parents wouldn't let me do certain things even after I turned 18, which is the age when you're considered an adult. Nah son, at my house it was more like "as long as you live under my roof....". And I lived under their roof....till I turned 25. You thought I'd be free then, huh? Wrong!
See, in our culture there's this thing called reputation. Having a good reputation is all that matters, cuz like BossMama says: people are watching your every move and they'll be talking. And the funny thing is, the people with the most skeletons in their closets, the people with the most sh!t, are always the ones talking. And they can't wait for you to fvck up somehow so they can talk about so and so's child did such and such. Like b!tch, do you know what YOUR child is doing???
It took me a long time to get to a point where I don't give a sh!t about other people and what they think about me and whether or not I'm Gambian enough or too Norwegian. The sad thing is that I see many young Gambian women who were born and bred here who turned to one of "them". They felt like they had to confirm to stheir way to be accepted, which is all fine and dandy. All I ask for is for not to be judged, that's all. I'm sick and tired of these gossip b!tches talking sh!t about other people's kids when errbody know what their kids are up to, like creeping with married men. And yeah, we know that those orange drinks you so-called good girls drink at those Gambian parties are boozed up like a muthaf*cka! Stop the hypocrisy, just because you aint doing your dirt out in the open doesn't mean that people don't know. Tell yo mama to stop talking sh!t about other people's kids coz we KNOW what her kid is doing.....
~I'm the Boss Lady~
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