My baby sister, Mini-Me, is 21 and in college. She's the smartest young lady I know. Sometimes I find myself wishing I had her smarts when I was her age. I'll think to myself "man I wish I knew at 20 what I know now!" coz that woulda saved me some heartache and disappointments. Mini-Me is so wise.....I'd like to think I had something to do with it, though. LOL. One of the things I had to learn the hard way was relationships and titles. Ladies, I know this is unfair as hell, but that's life. You meet a guy and yall are kickin' it and having a great time. You're doing all the lovey-dovey relationship stuff, he's treating you so good and you feel loved. After a short while you'll start referring to him as your boyfriend, your man. Coz clearly you're in a relationship now, right? WRONG!
Girl, if he hasn't come right out and said that you're his girlfriend, his lady, then yall aint in a relationship!! If you've already let him taste the candy box, then you are f*ck buddies, friends with benefits or however the hell he defines it. Bottom line is he's still a free agent. Just because you call him your man or boyfriend doesn't make him that. After you've been kickin it for 2 or 3 months you need to know where you stand. Yes ladies, don't be afraid to ask where this is going. Of course, it requires that you know what you want. If you're not looking for anything serious then keep on kickin it. But then you have to know your place. Yall aint in a relationship and that means that you can't act bat-sh!t crazy when you find out that he's kickin it with someone else.
On the other hand, if you want to take it to another level, you have to let him know. Ask him where this is heading. Tell him that you want to be in a committed and exclusive relationship. If he's on the same page as you are, then he's now officially your boyfriend/man. If he starts talkin sh!t about why you have to put a label on what you have, you aint nothin but an easy piece of azz to him. Why should he commit when he's getting everything so easy? You're over at his house cooking, cleaning, doing his laundry, and giving him great sex. Of course he wouldn't want to lose that. He doesn't care about you and deep down you know it too. Stop thinking that he'll come around or that if you cook some more or give him more head he'll eventually want to be in a relationship with you. He'll kick it with you until he meets a lady with enough self respect who demands to know where they're heading and she'll become the girlfriend. Meanwhile you've wasted 2 years of your life making someone your priority when you were just an option to him.
~I'm the Boss Lady~
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