Brothas, Please Work On Your Mack Game!

From urbandictionary.com
Mack- (verb) To hit on, flirt with, or seduce a female by using verbal or sometimes physical means of persuasion.

A few years ago I was in Paris with a brotha to represent a youth organization at a UN conference. Every time I think of that trip I start laughing my azz off. This brotha is a funny and very handsome fella. While walking through the streets of Paris he decided to work on his mack game. We went into a pâtisserie to get some of that great French pastries. The girl behind the counter was really cute, but didn't speak a word of English. We had to point at what we wanted. Then brothaman looked her straight in the eye, tilted his head a bit to the side and said:  if you were a burger at McDonald's I'd call you Mcbeautiful! OOOOMMMMGGG!!! I almost flatlined from laughing so hard. The girl just gave him an empty look like WTF is wrong with you??


I'm sure he's worked on his mack game since then cuz he's now married with kids LOL. Which brings me to my point. The art of approaching a lady is very delicate. Noticed that I said ladies and not chicken heads, little girls (grown azz women who act like girls) or hood rats. Yes, ladies....i don't care what you say, you get approached exactly the way you act and dress. You dress and act like a classless bird, that's exactly how you get treated. Unfortunately, some brothas just have no clue what so ever. You can look and act like Mrs. Obama and still get modasookas coming up to you with some bullsh!t line. 


Bullsh!t lines and dis-respectfulness I can deal with, it' the funny ones that have me cracking up. Yall African ladies know what I'm talking about. This just happened to me and no I couldn't make it up if I tried:


Brothaman: *in a very heavy West African accent* heelllooo my sista!
Me: *removing my headphones from my ears* hi....
BM: Where you from?
Me: Gambia
BM: Oh, I'm from Cameroon. You live here?
Me: No
BM: I would like to know you oohhh....you are very pretty lady oohhh
Me: ooookkk....well I'm married. 
BM: Oh that's fine...I just want to be your friend.
Me: I have enough friends....don't really want another friend.
BM: You're not allowed to have friends?? I just want to be your friend.
Me: there's my train! 
BM: sooo can I have your number?? I can call you and we talk...
Me: *roll my eyes and hop on the train*


NO NO NO!!! That is NOT  the right way to holla! Argh! You'd think it's only the brothas fresh of the boat who do that, but you'd be wrong. Some brothas even get mad when you turn them down, like you should feel special for being approached. Um...dude, unless you look anything like this.....   

.......corny lines will get you no play. Now, there's corny and there's disrespectful. I'll straight ignore your trfling azz for the latter, even if you look like one of these fine azz specimen. Have men forgotten how to approach women nowadays? Or have women lowered their standards to a bare minimum? Whatever happened to: hello, my name is x,y,z and I'd like to get to know you...? I blame the women. I've seen women answer to the most disrespectful and foolish calls - the pssst! eeey! and all kinds of bullsh!t. Can all the real gentlemen - and ladies- please stand up??    









~I'm the Boss Lady~ 

He Aint Your Man

My baby sister, Mini-Me, is 21 and in college. She's the smartest young lady I know. Sometimes I find myself wishing I had her smarts when I was her age. I'll think to myself "man I wish I knew at 20 what I know now!" coz that woulda saved me some heartache and disappointments. Mini-Me is so wise.....I'd like to think I had something to do with it, though. LOL. One of the things I had to learn the hard way was relationships and titles. Ladies, I know this is unfair as hell, but that's life. You meet a guy and yall are kickin' it and having a great time. You're doing all the lovey-dovey relationship stuff, he's treating you so good and you feel loved. After a short while you'll start referring to him as your boyfriend, your man. Coz clearly you're in a relationship now, right? WRONG!

Girl, if he hasn't come right out and said that you're his girlfriend, his lady, then yall aint in a relationship!! If you've already let him taste the candy box, then you are f*ck buddies, friends with benefits or however the hell he defines it. Bottom line is he's still a free agent. Just because you call him your man or boyfriend doesn't make him that. After you've been kickin it for 2 or 3 months you need to know where you stand. Yes ladies, don't be afraid to ask where this is going. Of course, it requires that you know what you want. If you're not looking for anything serious then keep on kickin it. But then you have to know your place. Yall aint in a relationship and that means that you can't act bat-sh!t crazy when you find out that he's kickin it with someone else.

On the other hand, if you want to take it to another level, you have to let him know. Ask him where this is heading. Tell him that you want to be in a committed and exclusive relationship. If he's on the same page as you are, then he's now officially your boyfriend/man. If he starts talkin sh!t about why you have to put a label on what you have, you aint nothin but an easy piece of azz to him. Why should he commit when he's getting everything so easy? You're over at his house cooking, cleaning, doing his laundry, and giving him great sex. Of course he wouldn't want to lose that. He doesn't care about you and deep down you know it too. Stop thinking that he'll come around or that if you cook some more or give him more head he'll eventually want to be in a relationship with you. He'll kick it with you until he meets a lady with enough self respect who demands to know where they're heading and she'll become the girlfriend. Meanwhile you've wasted 2 years of your life making someone your priority when you were just an option to him.

~I'm the Boss Lady~